Part 7 – Top Ten Parenting Mistakes
Some parents are afraid of making their child angry. Some parents are lonely for companionship. Either way, the parent’s emotional needs supersede the child’s. This formula can lead to a child who has no values or ethics, acts entitled, will say she has great parents but who actually has contempt for authority and does not actually hold her parents in high regard.
In one case a child did not earn her way through college or develop expertise in anything. Instead, she cut school, partied, became a drug dealer with expensive tastes and landed in jail and then prison a number of times. Even then, while in rehab she became angry at her mother for revealing to the drug counsellor she had a boyfriend (against the rules). Both mother and daughter lacked ethics.
The truth is that when you set and enforce limits consistently, you do not drive your child away, but rather you create an enduring respect.
Who says kid’s don’t come with a manual? Now they do! Dr Faye believes that parents need good theory as well as clinicians. With good theory they can parent better and self-correct as well. The Manual is not just for parents, the information enables adults to objectively evaluate their own childhood lessons and even ‘re-parent’ themselves on their own or with the help of therapy.